


Mojave Myth

by 101scribbles (orphan_account)



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Attempted Murder, Brain Damage, Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Head Injury, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Murder, Self-Hatred, i think???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-21
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-16 09:56:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11250747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/101scribbles
Summary: Loretta did not want to come back to life after her untimely death. She had a job she ad to finish and found herself as the face of a changing New Vegas. After all of this, all she wanted was her paycheck.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't feel like there are enough Benny/Courier fics, so here's one.
> 
> (Also this will be slightly non-canon, but what do you expect from a a fic)

 

_ Loretta _

I wasn't ready to die, as far as I can remember. And I sure as hell wasn't ready to wake back up with the most god-awful headache, have a strange man thoroughly question me, then sent free with just a "talk to Sunny." The doc pointed me the way to go, then shut his door. That was the last I saw of him. But I didn't think about him again for a while, even as I walked to the saloon his mere existence had slipped my mind.  Sure, I should have been grateful that he patched me up, even if I wasn't ready to wake up from what felt like a needed nap. 

I did wonder why I had ended up dead in this small town. I don't think I would have associated with something so... _boring_. I would imagine myself to be the type of girl that likes to travel this barren desert and find things no one else has seen or lived to talk about. Maybe that was more than I should amount to. I don't want to die again. 

The saloon was just as quaint as the rest of the town, as well as barren. A mere two people were in the front of the bar, and one girl and a dog in the back. The dog rushed me as soon as I stepped foot in the back room.

"Heel Cheyenne!" The girl said, "Don't worry, she won't bite unless I tell her too. The name's Sunny, Doc told me to expect you to come down here. He never mentioned your name."

"Loretta." I did not want to be classified as a liar in this small town, I doubted it would even matter later on.

"Here, take this and meet me out back," she said, "We'll make sure you can shoot before you head out."

I accepted the gun she offered me and followed her to a fence where she set up some empty bottles.

"Try to shoot them," she instructed. 

I aimed and hit three of the five she had set up.

"You have a good aim," Sunny nodded, "Want more practice?"

"No, the more I practice now the less ammo I'll have to defend myself later," I said.

"You're right, and I don't think any Sunset Sarsaparilla bottles will be attacking you in the Mojave."

We shared a laugh and continued on.

"If you want to defend yourself, you can come and help me clear some geckos at the water source," she had a hopeful look in her eye. I couldn't refuse. 

The geckos were horribly fast and could easily outwalk my sprint. Sunny, Cheyenne, and I took out a few before we had too much trouble.  

After Sunny shared a campfire meal with me, she too pointed me in the direction I needed to go. I would think about her a lot later on.

* * *

 

There isn't much to say about my trip for the next day, I walked along a long empty road and only got into two fights. One with some thugs and one with giant ants. 

I did, however, come to a crossroads. One way would take me up a mountain to a giant statue of two men shaking hands, the other to a burning village. I choose the former, thinking of my safety. The climb to the top of the mountain sucked! I might as well have climbed a wall. There wasn't even that much to see or do up there. Everyone looked really bored. I thought to go find out what the woman on the top of the roof was doing.

"I didn't hear you coming up, you don't broadcast your location, I like that," she said, "You don't look like a soldier or a caravaner."

"Just a courier," I said. 

"Oh good, then can you do me a favor?"

"What do you need done?"

"I need you to check on Nipton. I haven't seen any travelers coming from there in a few days. I'm not saying you need to go get yourself killed."

"Got it, I'm on it." 

"Mind yourself on the ramp."

I walked all the way back down the mountain and towards the pillar of smoke I wanted to avoid in the first place. 

Halfway to Nipton, I was ambushed by a group of people camping. They were a tough fight and put off almost more than I could handle. I had tried to take cover behind a car,  but they fire at the gas tank. I couldn’t see straight for the next few days.  

After I defeated the gang I stumbled into Nipton where I was grabbed by a maniac who screamed at me about some lottery. I pulled out a knife I had just taken off of one of the bodies. The man backed down from me.

“That’s right,” I snarled, “Stay away from me if you know what’s good for you.”

The man ran off, away from Nipton and into the desert.

I walked further into the city. The streets were covered in blood, I recall looking back later to see my footprints red and dripping when I left the city. There was also a horrible burning smell. I looked up to see decapitated heads pushed onto poles. It made me sick, but that was nothing compared to the feeling that terrorized my insides when I turned the corner to see a handful crucified on the sides of the street.

I ran up to one and started struggling with the ropes.

“Please…” the man begged, his voice was soft and his energy drained, “... _don’t._ ”

“I’m sorry,” I said, even though we both knew it wasn’t my fault and I couldn’t do anything about it.

As I walked away a group of men in dresses ran out of a Nipton Hall, as the building said. I backed away as one of them approached me, my hand hovered by my gun. 

“Don't worry, I won't have you lashed to a cross like the rest of these degenerates. It's useful that you happened by,” the man told me, “I want you to witness the fate of the town of Nipton, to memorize every detail. And then, when you move on? I want you to teach everyone you meet the lesson that Caesar's Legion taught here, especially any NCR troops you run across.”

“I-I-” I gained my composure, “What  _ lesson _ did you teach here?”

“Where to begin? That you are weak, and we are strong? This much was known already,” he continued, “But the depths of your moral sickness, your…dissolution? Nipton serves as the perfect object lesson.”

“What exactly happened here?” I asked.

“Nipton was a wicked place, debased and corrupt. It served all comers, so long as they paid,” he said. I was tired of hearing his strange voice, it reminded me of the geckos I just fought alongside Sunny, “Profligate troops, Powder Gangers, men of the Legion such as myself - the people here didn't care. It was a town of whores. For a pittance, the town agreed to lead those it had sheltered into a trap. Only when I sprang it did they realize they were caught inside it, too.”

“You captured everyone?” I was horrified, but I tried to keep my best poker face. I had felt like this was not a man to show fear to.

“Yes, and herded them to the center of town. I told them their sins, the foremost being disloyalty,” he told me, “I told them that when Legionaries are disloyal, some are punished, the others made to watch. And I announced the lottery. Each clutched his ticket, hoping it would set him free. Each did nothing, even when  _ loved ones _ were dragged away to be killed.”

The horror burned in my heart, it sizzled and erupting into a fiery rage. I tried my best to keep calm.

“You slaughtered innocent civilians?” I seethed.

“Innocent? Hardly,” he laughed, “Cowardly, though. They outnumbered us, yet not once did they try to resist. They stood and watched as their fellows were butchered, crucified, and burned, one by one. They stood and hoped their turn would not come. Each cared only for himself.”

“Who are you?”

“I am Vulpes Inculta, of Caesar's Legion. I serve my master as the greatest of his Frumentarii. We Frumentarii are soldiers of a different stripe, capable in battle, but skilled as infiltrators and agents as well,” he said.

“I’ve heard enough,” I spat at him.

“I think your eyes will see more than I could ever tell you. Take your time. Enjoy the sights.”

After Vulpes and his gang of legionaries left, I ran as fast as I could back to the Outpost.

“They’re dead,” I gasped when I made it back up to the ghostly pale Ranger. I told her they were attacked by the Legion and what they did. She cursed and talked about NCR borders. 

Once again, I was pointed in the direction to go to find the man who shot me and so I went that way.

 


	2. Chapter 2

_Loretta_

 

Novac is a small and dinky town based out of a motel. The first time I arrived I spotted the sniper watching me from the mouth of the dinosaur while I approached the town, but it was far after I entered his range. The first thing I did when I entered the town was rent a room and slept off the fatigue of three days without rest.

I woke sometime during the night. I didn’t figure the sniper would still be up in the mouth of the dinosaur statue so I went up to check out the views. I had been surprised that another man was up here, not the sniper from earlier. This one was taller and skinnier but he still retained quite a bit of mass muscle.

“Goddammit,” he grunted, “Don’t sneak up on me like that. What do you want?”

“What? Are you expecting visitors?” I asked.

“Yeah, I guess maybe I am,” he said, “But not like you… huh, maybe it should’ve been you I was expecting all along. Why are you here?”

“I just wanted to check out the view,” I told him, “It’s not every day I’m this high off the ground, looking out onto the horizon of the Mojave.”

“I think you’d better leave,” he told me.

“Sorry, just making friendly conversation,” I put my hands up and took a step back from him.

“I don’t have friends here,” he said with a snide.

“I’m not from here,” I retorted.

He nodded, “No. No, you’re not, are you? Maybe you shouldn’t go. Not just yet.”

“Why?”

“I need someone I can trust,” he said, “You’re a stranger. That’s a start.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“I want you to find something out for me. I don’t know if there’s anything to find but I need someone to try. My wife was taken from our home by Legion slavers one night while I was on watch. They knew when to come and what route to take, and they only took Carla. Someone set it up. I don’t know who.”

“You’re trying to track down your wife?”

“My wife’s dead. I want the son of a bitch who sold her,” he said.

My gut wrenched, “What-what do you want me to do when I find out who did it?”

“Bring them out in front of the dinosaur, while I’m on duty. I work nights,” he instructed, “Wear my NCR beret when you do so I know you’re with him. I’ll take care of the rest, I need to do this on my own.”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

“I’ll make it worth your while,” he said, “Another thing. We shouldn’t talk until this whole thing is over. Not until it’s over. No one here knows about what happened to Carla, and I want it to stay that way. Or the Legion will be after me next.”

“Got it, see ya,” I said.

“Yeah,” he nodded, he handed me his beret.

I put it in my bag until I needed to use it later.

I slept until morning, then started questioning people about what they knew about Carla. I started with Manny, then an ex-ranger, a delusional old man, and a farmer couple. They all had very nice things to say about Carla Boone: she was a sweet girl but she wasn’t accustomed to small-town living. It was a shame she disappeared, and they feel downright horrible for Craig Boone.

I  spoke with the woman I rented my room from. She did not like Carla, from what I could tell. She said she must’ve run away for good after she finally realized she was wasting her time.

I recall the exact moment I figured out she was the woman who had sold Boone’s wife into slavery. My face flushed and I tried to conceal it.

“Will you excuse me?” I asked. I left before she could answer.

I walked quickly past Boone who was on his way to work, I remember bumping shoulders with him. I apologized and went up to my room, and threw up in the toilet.

That same night, after everyone had gone to bed, and Boone and I were the only one’s awake, I snuck into the lobby of the motel and dug around, looking for evidence that Ms. Crawford was in fact, the monster who sold Carla into slavery. I picked the lock into the safe and dug through the items in it. I had found a bill of sale.

It read:

 _We, the representatives of the Consul Officiorum, have this day bargained and purchased from Jeannie May Crawford of the township of Novac the exclusive rights to ownership and sale of the slave Carla Boone for the sum of one thousand bottle caps, and those of her unborn child for the sum of five hundred bottle caps, the receipt whereof is hereby acknowledged. We warrant the slave and her young to be sound, healthy, and slaves for life. We covenant with the said, Jeannie May Crawford, that we have full power to bargain and sell said slave and her offspring. Payment of an additional five hundred bottle caps will be due pending successful maturation of the fetus, the claim to which shall be guaranteed by possession of this document. M. Scribonius Libo Drusus et al._  
_  
_ Administrators of M. Licinius Crassus, Consul Officiorum ab Famulatus

I hated this woman. She sold not only a young woman into slavery but also an unborn child into slavery.

I marched into her house and shook her awake. She scowled at me.

“What do you need?” she grumbled, still barely half-awake.

“I need to show you something, follow me,” I said.

I didn’t know she would be as gullible as she was. She followed me. As we stepped out in front of the dinosaur’s mouth I looked up for a brief moment to see if Boone were watching us, he was.

I put his beret on.

“What di-” Ms. Crawford was cut short, by death.

It was only seconds after I had put the beret on that Jeannie May Crawford’s life had come to an end.

I took the beret off and went to meet Boone.

“Is that it?” I asked him while handing back his beret.

He fasted his beret in place, “Yeah. How did you know it was her?”

“I found the bill of sale,” I told him, I pulled it out.

“I guess I shouldn’t be surprised,” he sighed, “It’d be like them to keep paperwork.”

He gave me a hundred bottle caps.

“Here, this is all I can give,” he said, “I think our dealings are done.”

“What will you do now?” I asked.

“I don’t know. I won’t be staying here, that’s for sure,” I said, “I don’t see a point in doing anything right now other than killing Legionnaires. Maybe I’ll wander, like you.”

“Come with me,” I offered, “Let’s go after the Legion.”

“You don’t want to do that.”

“I thought snipers worked in teams.”

Did I really? I felt like I had just word vomited. I can’t remember anything about me or my life, but I knew about snipers.

“Hmm,” he thought for a second, “Yeah. Working on your own makes you a lot less effective. I’ve been there and paid for it. But this isn’t going to end well.”

There was a beat.

“Fine. Let’s get out of here.” 


	3. Chapter 3

_ Loretta _

 

With Boone, I was able to take down enemies quickly and more efficiently. By morning break we had gotten to a gas station. We agreed that it was good to take a break and have some breakfast.

Boone started a fire to cook the meat from a radscorpion we killed just down the road.  I set my mailbag down and sat down next to the fire. The meat sizzled over it.

“Have you had radscorpion before?” I asked Boone.

“Yeah,” he said, “Not often. You?”

I paused, have I?

“I don’t know.”

Boone didn’t pay much attention to my answer. It didn’t matter to me. I wanted to know about my past before I had been shot in the head. 

“Boone,” I said, he looked up from the fire, “Do you know of any good doctors?”

“Yes,” he said, “In Freeside.”

“I need to go there.”

“Okay.” He didn’t say anything more of it, nor did he ask me why. I liked that, “I’ll show you there.”

Our next stop was called the Grub ‘n’ Gulp Rest Stop. We had lunch. Boone kept watch while I napped off another headache. Though, when I woke up an hour later to my ears ringing and the world around me blurring, I decided it was best if we got to Freeside sooner than later.

When we arrived in Freeside, Boone stopped me.

“If you want to keep whatever you carry in your bag,” he said, “Keep on hand over it and the other hand on your gun.”

I nodded and did what he suggested. 

“Where is the doctor?”

“Follow me.”

He lead me to a court enclosed by stone walls. 

“What is this place?”

“The old Mormon fort,” he said, “The Followers of the Apocalypse reside here.”

Now, my head was pounding harder than before. I felt the need to vomit, but I was unwilling to humiliate myself in the middle of Freeside. I had wanted to keep my cool factor up. I walked up to the first doctor I saw.

“Excuse me, I-”

He cut me off before I could finish, “If you’re looking for medical attention, try the other doctors. I’m just a researcher and not a particularly good one.”

“What-what kind of research?”

“Like, finding alternative treatments…” he said, “such as a stimpack made out of barrel cacti and other fun things. As far as fruitless wastes of time go, it’s quite noble in its aim.”

“What’s the goal?”

“For about a hundred years, the Followers have managed to get by using salvaged medical supplies from the Old World,” he said, “But the side effect of medical success is that more people get to live longer. Funny how that works… Eventually, we’ll run out of hospitals to loot. We need new ways to produce those supplies. Or maybe old ways, if this research goes anywhere.”

“You don’t sound too enthusiastic about it.”

“I’m enthusiastic about helping people,” he said, “but nihil novi sub sole.”

Next to me, Boone tensed up.

“Um… Isn’t that the language Caesar’s Legion speaks?”

“Caesar can site Cato to suit his purpose. Many people have spoken Latin. Some of them were quite pleasant,” he defended himself, “It’s unfortunate the language is associated with the gentlemen across the river.”

“How do you know Latin?”

“Not from the Legion, if that’s what you’re getting at,” he said, “Books. Sheet music. Gladiator movie holotapes. Bits and pieces here and there. The followers have extensive libraries, but we all draw our water from the same well. Even Caesar.”

I was starting to have trouble keeping my meal down.

“Can you point me to the doctor that is the best skilled in treating head injuries?”

The man thought for a moment, “I know quite a bit about head trauma. On second thought, I can give you the medical attention you need. Come with me into my tent.”

Boone and I followed him. The doctor sat me down across from him.

“What can you tell me about your brain injury?”

“Well, about a week ago, I guess,” I told him, “I was shot in the head twice,” I pulled my hair aside and pointed to the two healing entry wounds, “and a doctor from Goodsprings performed surgery to removed the bullets, but I don’t know how good he was because I haven’t felt right since… Then, maybe like four days ago, I was on my way to Nipton when I was ambushed by some thugs. I took cover behind a car, but it exploded. I’ve had a piercing headache since then, and sometimes my ears will ring or everything gets all bright and blurry.”

“Okay, tell me about yourself. What’s your name?”

“Loretta,” I knew that much or I had come up with it unknowingly.

“What about when you were born?”

I thought long and hard but couldn’t produce an answer.

“I-I don’t know.”

“Where are you from?”

I shook my head, “I don’t know.”

“Can you tell me the events leading up to you being shot?”

“Yes.”

“There’s a start, run me through that day.”

“Oh, I can’t do that,” I said, “But, I think I was knocked out or something. When I woke up I was tied up and I couldn’t talk so I guess they duct-taped my mouth shut… the details are kinda hazy, doc-”

“That’s okay,” he said, “Just tell me everything you can remember… any call me Arcade.”

“Um… this man,” I recalled, “he was wearing a checkered suit and told me something about a game. Then he shot me.”

“Can you tell me anything you remember before then?”

I thought, and thought, and thought. I was able to remember a beautiful woman, wearing the mailbag I adorned now. My… my mom!

“My mom, I think she was a courier too,” I said, “I remember her walking away with this on.” I patted my bag.

“Is that all you can remember?”

I nodded.

“What do you remember abo-”

“How is this supposed to help her head?” Boone interrupted harshly.

“Loretta is suffering from amnesia,” Arcade explained, “Making her think about her past, rather than ignoring it may help her regain some memories. Now, Loretta, what can you tell me about your mother? What does she look like?”

“She’s tan…” I said, like me. The hours of walking in the sun came with being a courier, “She has brown hair, to her shoulders. She looks strong, and she has a rifle strapped to her back.”

I sighed. 

“That’s all I can remember,” I said.

“That’s okay,” he told me, “Head injuries can take a while to heal from.”

I nodded, “Uh, also since that car exploded next to me, I’ve felt kinda nauseous too. I feel like I’ve been holding back the urge to throw up.”

“That may be more heatstroke tha-”

Boone interrupted Arcade again.

“When will the medical treatment begin?”

Arcade was becoming frustrated with Boone. I saw him grab his lab coat and ball it up in his fists by his knees.

“The treatment of severe head trauma is nothing I can rush,” he said, “As much as I would like to stick a stimpack in her and let you two run along, I can't. Stimpacks can't treat amnesia.”

“Boone, how about you go get a drink and meet me back here in a few hours?”

“Sure.”

Boone left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been writing this story faster than I've written anything else.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'm able to write this so quickly because I'm just following the plot of the game with my own interests.

_ Arcade _

 

I was able to give Loretta proper treatment after her partner left. I took her vitals and treated the lacerations on her face. I noticed her eye, her left eye, was a considerably lighter shade of green than her right eye. One of the entry wounds was just above the eye, probably causing permanent damage. 

“I’m sorry about Boone,” she said a few minutes after he left, “I just met him, I didn't know he would be that aggressive.”

“The NCR tends to be aggressive,” I told her. I thought I could fill her in on the politics happening in the Mohave, “They decided to take control of New Vegas to extend territory eastward. But, Caesar's Legion is trying to do the same thing, extend territory westward. They’re both overextending themselves. Neither of them has enough troops to hold their current territory and take the new land.”

She looked down at a paper in her hand.

“What about Mr. House? Who is he?”

“He runs the Strip right now,” I told her, “He lives in Lucky 38, but no one has been in there before the war. Only his robots go in and out.”

She grunted. 

“Boone was with the NCR,” she said, “He’s a sniper, former 1st Recon. He’s been watching my back. Which is good for me, because I haven't been seeing straight this week.”

“Do you know anything else about him?”

“A little, but it isn't my place to be sharing it,” she told me, “He didn't really want to share it with me, but given the circumstances he did.”

“I won't ask about it then.”

“Good idea.”

She was quiet while I cleaned the entry points. I moved her hair out of the way and wrapped a bandage around her head. 

“Arcade,” she said, “I have a proposal for you.”

“Okay,” I nodded, “I’ll hear you out.”

“Um,” she pulled at her thumb and looked down.

“No, please keep your head up, I’m not done.”

“I want you to come travel with Boone and me,” she said, “Before you say no, I want to say how this would benefit us all.” She paused. “For you, you research different ways to make medical supplies. If you come with us you can not only do you research in the field but you would also have at least one willing participant for you to test on. Also, you would have a tough courier and a sniper watching your back.”

“The benefits for you?” I asked. I wrapped the bandage over her eye to prevent the sun from damaging any more of her eye.

“Wait, I can’t see.”

“I know, but your eye is damaged,” I told her, “It seems that your iris is stunted open, as well. Covering it will help you in the long run.”

“Oh.”

“About those benefits?”

“Well, I don't want to stay an amnesiac forever and Boone doesn't like to talk,” she said, “at least about past events. If you stuck around, I would actually be challenged to think about my past life, and hopefully, I’ll recover. Also, I would have to run back here for check ups in my healing process. And if Boone or I got hurt, maybe you would feel kind enough to help us out. You did say you were enthusiastic about helping people.”

“Are there any cons?”

“Three adults can't share a bed.”

I thought for a moment. I didn't want to travel in a group of three, but the pros outweighed the cons. It would benefit everyone. They would have medical attention on demand and I could go further with my medical research.

“I’ll go.”

She smiled, “Great.”

I tied off the bandage. 

“I’m-I’m gonna-”

I took a step back and tried to put a bucket in front of her as quick as I could. Most of her vomit got in the bucket, but some did get on the floor and on my hand. 

“I’m sorry,” she muttered before throwing up again.

“That’s okay,” I said, “Keep your head between your knees, I’ll be back.”

I washed my hands and got a rag, a bottle of clean water, another bucket, and some food.

When I got back, Loretta was trying to take steady deep breaths. I was glad she was trying to take care of herself while I had stepped out and glad she was doing the right thing. She must have known someone with a medical background before she was shot or she knew about caring for herself when she throws up. I knew a few pregnant women that said they had to get used to it. Oh no, oh god. What if she’s had a kid? There’s no way I can put that fear into her head.

“Are you just going to stand there?”

“Oh no,” I gave her the bottled water and replaced the bucket. 

She didn't throw up again. Instead, she ate slowly and drank her water. 

“Arcade,” she said, “I’m looking for a man who wears a checkered suit.”

“You know, I think I saw a man going into the Strip wearing that.”

“Where is that?”

“It's two gates north,” I said, “but you need a passport or two thousand caps to get through.”

“I don't have either of those things,” she said.

“We’ll figure it out.”

There was some silence. She ate the food I had given her and downed more water.

“So Boone and I follow you around?” I asked.

“Yeah,” she nodded, “I have the map.”

Loretta pointed to her PipBoy that I had noticed earlier when she walked in.

“Well, I mean it’s not following me around, it's… yeah following around.”

“I’m not so sure how well following around an amnesiac will go, but I’m up for it.” 

She smiled, “Good, I enjoy talking to you.”

I nodded, “You should get some rest, I’ll pack my things and wait for Boone to get back.”

Loretta nodded. She kicked her boots off and laid down on my bed. I packed up medical supplies, and a couple weapons. Just what a reasonable person would bring when following around a person with severe head injuries. 

I also checked with Julie to tell her I would be doing research in the field, and that Loretta would be willing to undergo experimental medical treatments to help further my research. 

I didn’t go back to my tent when I was done getting my few possessions together, mainly because I believe Boone wouldn’t appreciate me hovering over Loretta while she was sleeping. Or Loretta for that matter either. So I sat and waited in another tent. 


	5. Chapter 5

_ Loretta _

I woke from my nap two hours later, I was holding my bag tightly to my chest. I made a vow to myself that moment, the next person who tried to rob me would die. But, the man who robbed me of my delivery… when I thought of him, I felt butterflies. He was bad, down-right awful. I remember his face and just how handsome he was. I didn’t want to kill him, not at all. I’m not sure we could talk about it, but I was willing to give him an olive branch. But first, I would have to find a way into The Strip.

Arcade was gone out of the tent, but Boone was standing in the entryway, with his back to me.

I got out of bed and walked past him.

“Ready?”

“Yes,” he nodded.

“Great,” I said, “Arcade is coming with us too. Protection in exchange for medical service with the added bonus of field research and medical experimentation.”

“I didn’t sign up to be tested on.”

“I did, I told him I didn’t know if you were willing or not and that you should be allowed to make your own choice.”

“Sure.”

I looked around, then saw Arcade towering over everyone else. I walked over to him.

“Ready?” I asked.

He nodded.

“Where to first, boss?” Arcade asked.

“Let me thing while I put this hat on,” I said, I pulled out a black cowboy hat I had stolen from a guy I fought earlier. The hat covered most of my bandages, but I wouldn’t be able to cover the ones over my eye without looking stupid. Maybe I looked tougher now. Oh, where did I want to go?

“Let’s go to Mick & Ralph’s,” I said, “I want to see if they really have everything.”

It would be awhile before I learned to live without the use of my left eye. Until then, Boone had my back. I couldn’t walk in a straight line at first, Arcade leaned against me to keep me from staggering around. It would take a few days until I would adjust to the sudden loss of depth perception, but during those few days I would notice my headaches would decrease tremendously. 

Another thing I would notice is having an extra hard time adjusting to the light going in and out of the building. When we entered Mick & Ralph’s I could barely see. It was a few moments before I made out the silhouettes in the store. Boone guided me to the first man inside, he stood behind the counter.

“Hey, Ralph,” Boone greeted, “My associate is looking for a way into the Strip.”

“Nice to see you again Boone,” the man said, “Since when did you start keeping Followers and cripples as your company, and not your wife?”

“It's not your place to ask that.” 

My blood boiled, who was he to talk to us like that?

“Excuse me?” I started calmly, “You have no right talking to me and my friends like that.”

“Whoa whoa whoa,” he put his hands up, “Only trying to joke around, ‘parently wasn't that funny out loud than it was in my head. Sorry.”

Boone didn't say anything else, so I stepped up.

“As Boone said, I’m looking for a way to get into the Strip,” I said, “I’ve heard you gotta say in.”

Ralph glance between the three of us.

“Yeah, fine,” he broke, “I gotta a little something on the side, a way to get in. But it’ll cost ya.”

“How much?”

“500 caps.”

“Oh come on now,” I said, “Ralph, I can make it worth your time.”

“Hey, boss,” Arcade said, “Boone and I are gonna go grab some drinks, we’ll meet you back at the Old Mormon Fort.”

“Alright,” I nodded, “See you too later.”

They left, and it was just me and Ralph.

“Ralph,” I said, “I may only be looking at you with one eye, but I can see that you’re needs have been abandoned too long. You’re a lonely guy, you have friends but… they can't give you everything you want… everything you need.”

“I-uh-”

I leaned over to counter and ran my finger down his chest.

“I can make it worth your while, Ralphie,” I said, “Something for you, something for me.”


	6. Chapter 6

_ Boone _

I have never met anyone like Loretta. Arcade explained that damage to whatever part of her brain she got shot in could lead to increased promiscuous and aggressive behavior. I also asked why he had covered her eye, turns out a gunshot to the eyebrow can stunt your pupil open and cause damage to the inside of your eye. That’s not good, she wouldn't be able to hit as many legionaries. 

“Do you think Loretta knows there are other ways to get into the Strip?” Arcade asked.

“You said she was amnesiac,” I said, “So she wouldn't.”

“We could've put our caps together.”

“She has less than a hundred caps,” I told her, “I only have a couple hundred, unless you have over a thousand to spare, the credit check would be useless.”

“I just hope she doesn't think she has to sell her body to get places.”

I didn't want that either. I kept to my drink and didn't say much more. 

We met Loretta not much longer after we left her. She smiled and showed us a passport. 

“Didn't take as long as I expected,” she said.

“Loretta, you didn't have to do that,” Arcade said, “We could’ve found another way to get in.”

“But I got us in, didn't I?” She asked, “I did what I had to.”

“You don't have to-”

“Arcade, I’m my own woman,” she snapped, “I can make my own choices and I can live with the consequences. I don't need you judging me for them.”

Arcade took a deep breath and didn't say anything more. 

Loretta lead us into the Strip. A Securitron rolled up to speak with her, I paid no attention. My mind was elsewhere. I thought of Carla, how this city brought us together. How talkative she was, how beautiful she was. My mind wandered and I thought of us raising our child, a daughter as I hoped.

I imagined us moving away from Novac and back to California. I imagined us bringing up a daughter in a safe community, one where people wouldn't disappear. One where Carla and my child weren't gone. 

“Boone, are you coming?” Loretta caught my attention. She and Arcade were waiting ten feet ahead.

“Yeah,” I nodded. I caught up with them. We only walked for a few more moments before Arcade and I were stopped by the same Securitron. Loretta had led us to the Lucky 38, Carla loved to wonder what it was like on the inside. 

“Sorry, Mr. House’s invitation only extends to you,” it said, “Your friends will have to wait outside.”

Loretta looked back at us, she looked upset, “I’m sorry. You can't come in. I’ll come back soon. Just wait here.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

Loretta entered the casino, leaving Arcade and me to sit on the stairs until she came back.

I wondered if Loretta and Carla would get along. I would think Carla would be glad Loretta helped me take revenge on Jeannie May for selling her. They both are talkative, I think they would find things to talk about. Carla wouldn't like spending time with Loretta, she's cold-blooded and prepared to kill anyone. 

But I don't know enough about Loretta to judge how she and Carla would have gotten along. 

I do wish they could've met, I wish I could be with her and my child right now, instead of waiting in the sun for an aggressive, promiscuous, amnesiac woman to get back from her meeting with a two-hundred-year-old mystery casino man.  I wish I didn't kill her. I wish I could have saved her, I wish I could have stood a chance against them. I wish we never moved to Novac. 

 

Loretta came back for us after a quarter of an hour with the news that Arcade and I were allowed inside. We were taken to the Presidential Suite, given baths, given warm meals, and given beds. It was a luxury I wish I could’ve given to Carla, it was one she could’ve had if we had just stayed here in the first place. 

Loretta was gone as soon as she dropped us off in the suite, with so little as an “I have a score to settle, I’ll be back tomorrow… the cocktail lounge is open for you to use as well.”

I went there just to see what it was. 

Carla would have loved the view. She would have loved to look down on The Strip, the lights illuminating the dark Mojave night, watching people stumble from casino to casino. 

I saw Loretta enter the Tops. That was Carla’s favorite. I tried to think of something Carla would say about Loretta visiting the place. It was no use. In my mind, I could see her lips moving, but nothing came out. I could no longer remember what her voice sounded like. 

I wasn’t sad about losing Carla, far from it. I was mad that I was betrayed by my own neighbors. I was angry that the Legion kidnapped her. I was enraged that I pulled the trigger.

I clenched my fist, turned away from the window, and held back the urge to upturn the nearest couch. Instead, I drowned my anger in alcohol. I took shot after shot until I felt like the twenty-year-old I was when I first met Carla. I knew I would regret it the next morning, but it was a pain I wanted. A pain I deserved. 


	7. Chapter 7

_ Loretta _

My weapons were taken from me upon my entry of The Tops, but I didn’t need them anyway. I had changed into a green and yellow dress Ralph had given me as an extra payment. Or as he said, “Something nice to show yourself off in.” I even took the time to make my bandages fashionable, well as much as they could be.

Ralph was right, it showed my body off in ways I didn’t know it could be shown off in. I strutted around the casino, looking for that checkered suit jacket that’s burned an image in my head. When I did find it, he spoke first. 

“What in the goddamn?” he stared at the bandaged covering most of my face, “Let’s keep this in the groove, hey? Smooth moves, like smooth little babies.”

“When you shot me,” I lowered my voice to sound sultry, “you ran off so fast I never got your name.”

He scoffed, “You making a pass at me, sister? Because I am out of your league.” His eyes said otherwise. 

“What?” I drawled, “Is it wrong to want a guy who’d shoot me in the head?”

“Did those bullets scramble your egg?” his eyes widened slightly, but he played it off cool, “Or have you always been a naughty broad?”

“Girls like bad boys,” I stepped closer to him and fixed his tie, “and you’ve been downright awful.”

He kept his eyes down, and his voice came to a whisper as he leaned in closer, “You’re one sick pussycat, doll. There’s quins and there’s…” he chuckled, “I don’t even know what to call you.”

“I’m saying I dig you,” I said bluntly, “despite it all. What do you day?”

“I hear ‘dig’ from you, babe,” only now does he meet my eye, my hand is still on his chest, “all I can think of is a shovel. How can this be? This ain’t forgiveness, it’s something… wrong.”

I made one last attempt, “I’m a courier, remember? Don’t you want me to handle your package?” 

“All right, honey baby, this is all kinds of wrong, but to my suite it is,” he said, he stepped away from me, “Thirteenth floor. Don’t keep me waiting.”

I followed him to his suite, he closed the door behind us and said to me, “Benny is going to show you the Tops!”

He ran one hand down my side and the other to pull me against him. 

“I hope you’re built sturdy, you crazy broad,” he purred in my ear.

He moved his mouth from my ear to my lips and made for a stunning kiss. He held onto my hips and pushed me back onto his bed. I pulled him down on top of me by his tie.

“Let’s find out what you’ve been hiding under that checkered suit,” I said while unbuttoning his jacket.

“More than you’ve ever dreamed, baby.”

His clothes came off quickly, but not as quick as he had gotten my dress off. He leaned down over me again to kiss my neck. 

Benny was brash and rough but slow. He was very different from Ralph, who was soft but came quickly. Benny took his time to explore my body, he had one hand on my waist and one hand moving up my stomach to my breast. Benny kissed down to my collarbone, then came back up to my mouth to give me a gentle kiss. He rested one hand over the damaged half of my face. I removed my hand from his shoulder to pull his hand off my face. 

“Don't-touch-my face-please,” I said between kisses.

“Alright, baby,” he whispered. Benny moved down again, this time to my hips. He spread my legs and ran his fingers up my thigh. He bent down slowly, keeping his eyes locked with mine. I felt his warm breath against my vagina. His thumb crept up to massage my clit as he licked me. 

I bit my lip to hold back a gasp.

Benny thrust his tongue in between the fold and tasted my insides. He used his other hand to push my legs further apart.

“Wa-wait,” I stuttered, I tried not to blush as I said, “I want to ride your face.”

“You're a platinum pussycat,” he nodded, “You know how to swing.”

We shuffle to trade places. I was sat on Benny’s chest while he got situated. He grabbed my thighs and pulled me onto his face. His tongue work drove me crazy, I started to move my hips back and forth. Every flick, every swirl of his tongue brought me closer to climax. I reached back and palmed Benny, earning a moan from him. 

“Oh god,” I moaned, I ground roughly onto his face, “I’m so close!”

He flipped me over and pushed himself in. He was rough, he gasped at my hips, he sucked on my neck. I couldn’t remember, but I felt like I’d never been handled like this before. It wasn’t worse, but it wasn’t better. It felt nice, but after taking a beating in the Mojave, I would rather be taken more gently. 

Benny was getting sloppy, his thrusts were getting harder. He bit down on hard on my shoulder and pulled out quickly. He came on the sheets and rolled over.

“That was a nice bit of hey-hey, girlie. You're a real ring-a-ding broad!” he said with a sigh, “Hold me, will ya? I swear you wore me out.”

He pulled me into a hug, I wrapped my arms around him. He quickly fell asleep. I laid for an hour, making sure he was deep in sleep. I slipped out of bed and pulled the knife I had hidden in my bag. I looked Benny in the face one last time, just like he had done with me, and slit his throat. I made sure to push hard enough so he wouldn’t be able to breathe. 

Benny woke up in a few seconds. He could only gape his mouth his mouth at me. He tried to gasp or scream, but he only made croaking sounds. 

“What was that you told me when you shot me?” I mocked him, “You’ve got 18 karats bad luck? Yeah, well… the game was rigged from the start.”

“Fuh, ack,” he grasped his neck. His sheets were drenched with blood by now. He was bleeding out and asphyxiating. It was beautiful.

“Wow, I never want this moment to end,” she said. 

He wasn’t able to speak, so he pulled one blood-soaked hand away from his throat and flipped me off. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a little bit of writer's block while I was writing this. Also, is it strange that I'm more on board with writing violence than sex? I had a lot more trouble writing their sex scene than I did writing the part where Loretta killed Benny.


End file.
